There have been very few posts on here that don’t relate to new albums, but this one isn’t even music related. I want to rant and it’s my blog so I can!

It turns out I really, really REALLY don’t like the Netflix series of Wednesday.

I managed the first episode of the second part of series 2 and realised that I don’t know what is going on and equally that I no longer give a crap about what is going on.

I should point out that I consider the Addams Family Values film one of the top five films made in my lifetime (all you cultural snobs can stop sniggering now) and that the first Addams Family film is not too far behind. Both my daughter and I can quote these films off by heart and we must watch them at least three time a year

There is so much wrong with Wednesday, but I can break it down in a few simple sections:

The Premise

The whole point of the Addams is that the humour derives from this strange family being put in everyday situations and their interaction with everyday people.

Examples from the films are Gomez reporting Fester missing to the Police, the whole family at the school play, the children at Summer Camp and Morticia reading to the nursey class in the first film – that scene alone deserved an Oscar (It’s my blog, sue me for over exaggeration).

The set up for Wednesday feels like it dribbled out of the collective fetid brains of a room full of marketing executives –

“I don’t think this has been done before…. Let’s set it in a boarding school / castle. Like Hogwarts.”     

“And let’s give all the pupils special powers. Like Hogwarts”

“Oh, and let’s have lots of famous actors playing the teachers. Like Hogwarts”.

What’s the point of being an outcast family if you’re surrounded by other outcasts?

The great love affair

Whether its John Astin and Carolyn Jones or Raul Julia and Anjelica Huston the simple fact is that Gomez and Morticia should be besotted with each other even to the point that the rest of the world doesn’t exist. At a single word of French from Morticia, Gomez should be kissing her hand and then up her arms whilst offering promises of whips and chains.

In Wednesday, Catherine Zeta-Jones says ‘Mon Cher’ and Gomez DOES NOTHING. LITERALLY NOTHING. It's almost as if they are not interested in each other.

This is just so not right, and this alone should have resulted in the cancellation of the series.

The enemy

The bad guy shouldn’t be some awful CGI monster (I mean, look at the state of it) it should be normal people with their petty vices.

From the Addams Family it’s Tully and Dr Pinder-Schloss and a simple case of greed

For the Addams Family Values, it’s the dogma of Gary Granger and Becky Martin-Granger that everyone can have a great time as long as they are good looking, white and Christian (and of course the homicidal mania of the serial killing nanny).   

Whilst I understand that Wednesday looks amazing, as any Tim Burton film does, and that the purist will bleat that “Gomez is now closer to the original comic version” I just can’t bring myself to get any sort of enjoyment out of it.